The Language of Communication
It struck me today how little words we need to communicate…
How much communication is a language of souls and a willingness to connect…
If there is warmth and a desire to understand one another, then communication will happen and the words are not so important…
The language of the heart is of the essence.
I can remember many years ago, when I was twenty one years old, having a lovely holiday romance in Spain, with a French boy called Gilles…
I looked him up the other day on Google, and discovered he had become an international footballer and is now a highly successful lawyer…
Anyway…
We did not speak one another’s language and after ‘two wonderful weeks’, we had to part, and I remember him saying to me…
‘It is like I have a French Girlfriend who doesn’t speak French and doesn’t live in France…’
I took from that, that he felt connected to me like he would someone from his own country… But we were simply unable to speak one another’s language.
And then I have a friend who speaks five languages; who tells me that the languages bring out different aspects of him, and that he accesses parts of himself and ways of being when he speaks Spanish and Portuguese that he doesn’t when he speaks English…
I am also aware that words can be used for deceit, with agenda, with unkindness…
But of course acts of cruelty or abuse do not need language either…
I also remember years ago when I was in my twenties and running our Fitness Centre in Bath, that a deaf man joined…
I liked him a lot, and found I could communicate well with him, despite having no sign language. I found the connection with him more real and safer in many ways, than with other people who could hear.
He didn’t stay in the gym though, other people did not recognise his needs, they misunderstood him. and he felt ostracised and so stopped coming…
I have craved real connection all my life.
Searched for it in others, often through ‘deep conversation…’
Which I discovered hasn’t necessarily meant anything at all in the end…
It was just a fun distraction.
I have learnt as the years have gone by, that connection with others is only attained through a true connection to myself; that the longing for another to meet me, to satisfy that craving was an addiction, and the feeling of connection was short lived…
When the connection to the places that felt a yearning for love, or a longing for approval, or a need for recognition have been met by myself, I have discovered that in the mirror of others I have then found these things…
And so it is with language, if we are connected to ourselves, then there is an ease amongst our fellow human beings, and if there is a real desire to speak the language of another, this will be acted upon…
This is for sure…
We can learn one another’s language…
But as with everything, there is a difference between wanting to speak a language and the desire to connect with one another.
This only comes from a willingness to truly accept, understand and connect with ourselves; from this place we will truly recognise that we are one…
Human beings respond to warmth, and love and kindness, and a willingness to engage….
The next step is to learn to speak the language of the land…
But the language of the heart and soul is by far the most important
From this place all the words will be kind words, and the actions matching this vibration of truthful expression…
The language of love…
I have been running all of my life – it feels I was born to run. In the running step I experienced freedom and my true expression. I came to see that I needed to ‘get out of the way of myself’ and let my energy flow through the running step; allow it to express itself in the dance and the motion of running. I ran for England and GB for some years. My first international was in 1979, a three mile cross country race; and I continued to run at international level until 1993. Two of my best results were first place in the Dublin City Marathon in 1985 and 7th place woman, 3rd British woman in the 1986 London Marathon in a time of 2.36.31, which gained me selection for the Commonwealth Games.
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Email : juliachitaylor@gmail.com
