Why Do I Feel Fragile?

This week I feel a bit strange. My mood has dipped, and while I expected to be happy about my children returning to school after the summer holiday, I actually feel deflated. Yes, I admit, I miss my darlings when they are at school. They might squabble and shout, but they are my girls, and I love them. But I do need a break, which is why the school term is very helpful. The children need stimulation, and they receive a programme of activities that I couldn’t possibly provide, because I simply do not have the patience. Maybe I am a little upset about the return to school.

There could be something else bothering me. I say that I feel fragile, because I really don’t know how else to explain it. Throughout the summer I have been quietly processing a lot of emotional weight, and I have used my reiki practice to shift unwanted energies and help to clear my mind and body. I know that something has shifted because I feel it, and that is a good thing. But now I have a strange sense of loss. Maybe I finally released some emotional attachments that I didn’t know I was holding onto. It is possible. I have consciously chosen to stop dwelling on the past and move on into the future with all sorts of current events in my life.

My marriage has evolved during the past twelve months or so, and while I cannot divulge the details, I can say that it has brought my husband and me closer together. We are stronger, and we are battling through the daily challenges that everybody fights. Our children are healthy and happy, we are settled in our new home, and everything is looking good for the future. It can only improve from here.

So maybe this week is about me moving on properly. Maybe I can cast off the weight of past losses, the frustration of things that did not go my way, and the anger towards people that had hurt me. I can move on into the autumn season with a smile on my face, wisdom in my mind, and love in my heart.

Are you moving on?

 

 

Catherine is the author of the adult paranormal romance series The Redcliffe Novels and also The Darkness of Love, She has short stories published in YA anthologies, freelance articles on various industry websites, and contributes to her personal blog, and her author blog .

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